Psalm 15

"How long wilt thou forget me, O Lord? forever? how long wilt thou hide thy face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? how long shall mine enemy be exalted over me? Consider and hear me, O Lord my God: lighten mine eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death; Lest mine enemy say, I have prevailed against him; and those that trouble me rejoice when I am moved. But I have trusted in thy mercy; my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation. I will sing unto the Lord, because he hath dealt bountifully with me." -Psalm 13 (KJV)

What is one to do in times of trial and distress if G-d is really sovereign? If the Lord really has chosen you before the foundation of the world as the scriptures say (Ephesians 1), what does an honest man think when the going gets more than just tough? What do you pray to the Lord when all of your requests seem to go unheard? What is it that you are to do when everything that you love is taken from you?

There are those, of course, who do not think that G-d is sovereign over all things. And by those, I mean there are those Christians who espouse such a belief. It is true, they usually think He is sovereign in some way or in some things- but they do not know how to reconcile His sovereignty over all things with the suffering and loss they experience right now. They think to themselves that because they do not know how to reconcile it, it must not be.

Other Christians examine their own trials and losses and think that God must still be sovereign in all things (for they are loathe to abandon such a point) and so the promises of rebirth, ressurection, and kingdom, are where they place all their hope. In fact, many in this camp abandon all hope for good in THIS life. They choose to keep a stiff upper lip, grin and bear it, and just plug on through until death- where/ when they believe, all will be made right. They do not know what to make of their sufferings here, so they pin their hopes all on something in the future.

There are other responses to be sure- and here I make no attempt to support or tear down either response mentioned. These responses do make a point, however, and that is that one cannot live well with internal tension. A man or woman who experiences pain, suffering, loss, persecution, ridicule, and heartache must try to come to terms with it. We as people (and most assuredly even more so as Christians) seek to integrate all our beliefs and actions. We seek for what Nancy Percey calls Total Truth and what Francis Schaeffer called Truth with a capital T before her. We can say a lot of things, but we cannot live a lot of the things we say.

So how do we make sense of the defeats and trials of life? The first thing we need to do is be honest with G-d. David cries, "how long wilt thou forget me, O Lord?" How many of us have gotten to the place where we cannot shout the same cry? If you want to make sense of anything, you have to own up to it. We must first be honest about how we feel. For now, I will weep as you weep and I pray that you will mourn as I mourn.