The Dirtiness of Self

I have always disliked Wal-Mart. Every time I go into one of their stores I feel out of place. I feel extremely uncomfortable. I have nothing against big business in principle mind you- so it is not that. I have often wondered just what it is that bothers me so much about Wally World. I have never been able to figure it out. Sure, the people are fatter, poorer, and dirtier than in other stores (and at least half of the customers always seem to be wearing sweat-pants), but I do not feel out of place in an inner-city setting, or a third-world setting (both of which often have poorer and dirtier people... although not usually fatter). And let us not forget that I am not rich and I have read and accepted the book of James (among others). So the people do not seem to be sufficient reason for me to be disturbed every time I walk into a Wal-Mart. There is the huge amount of cheap crap for sale- but other places (like the Christmas Tree shop, or Building 19) which also sell loads of crap do not weird me out in the slightest. There is the "heard-of-sheep-grazing" set-up in the store that appeals to a particular type of consumerism that offers almost no concern for the product offered and very little customer service. It's all just "help yourself", if you will. That still does not seem like enough to really get under my skin, though.

So What could it be? Well, I am still not really sure. However, I think that the whole poverty of the place might remind me of everything I see as cheap and dirty in myself. Perhaps I need to come to terms (in some manner of speaking) with all of the work yet to be done by God in my own life. Perhaps I still hate myself a little too much and don't really like to be reminded of it. I suppose time will tell. Thank God for His faithfulness.