On Examinations

Sometimes when you are waiting for a seemingly needless reason, you think of things. I wonder why it is that people can be so impatient. I wonder why I can be so impatient. Action and faith. Action with faith. Action through faith. What is out of place? What sparrow has fallen unbeknownst? Life is as it is. May I not rest in myself.

On Reason

Why is it that reason does not seem to always be enough to justify a belief? Why is it that you can have reason contrary to your belief? Is it your brain? Does reason have nothing to do with belief? Is reason an illusion? (I had a class about this once- it was really funny that we reasoned for three hours about whether or not reason was an illusion). And I mean by that- Do we always make decisions based on things other than reason? Or is the disconnect between belief and reason (which we sometimes experience in our own lives) due to something else?

On False Distinction

So one of my professors tells me that he does not understand the materialist/ supernaturalist distinction. Now of course, he does actually understand it and he really just thinks it is bogus or at best trivial and meaningless. But his "rub you the wrong way" method of communicating does not automatically determine the truth value of his arguments. They still could be right. He tells me that the term supernatural is like the term fuzzy- only with more baggage. That is to say a supernatural being (such as an angel) is like a fuzzy animal (such as a kitten). So his question seems to be- what does fuzzy really tell you about the cat? In the same way- what does supernatural really tell you about the angel? He told me that the distinction may be largely to blame for the belief that some people have that science is somehow anti-religion, or anti-God (or gods). Now the challenge he put to me is to define supernatural in some sort of meaningful way. He did not seem taken with my suggestion that it was both significant and meaningful for supernatural to be a statement of our ignorance. Angels are not subject to the "laws of nature" I said- they may be subject to laws- but we do not know what they are. He asks me then, is anything not subject to the laws of nature then appropriately called supernatural? What about things before the big bang? Are they supernatural?
So I am thinking about it, but what things before the big bang? My problem is that I still do not quite grasp the fuzzy animal analogy. I mean I see what the analogy is saying- but I just find it easy to see what supernatural is saying- what it means. Now, of course, he wants a philosophical definition- which is a bit of work- so this will be continued later, but I think that when God disrupts the natural laws of the universe to perform a miracle that it makes perfect sense to call that a supernatural event. So what he wants to know (basically) is why anyone would insist on calling the ressurection of Jesus Christ a supernatural event. I think that is a valid question for him to ask. The answer will take as long or as short as it takes to think about. I suspect a significant amount of meditation will be required. May the Lord grant me wisdom beyond my years.

On The Inside

They say it comes from inside. He says it comes from inside. I need it to come from inside. Do you know what it is like in there- down deep where the ocean is dry where the desert is cold and the sun is dark? If it is in there it is anywhere it is everywhere- you just need to open up and out it flows- out from the inside. The liars, the hypocrites, we know what I mean. The fools, the ignorant- we know nothing. We say too much; we say too little. We are foolishly brave; we are cowards. Fear is where it starts. And fear is where it will end if you do not fear. Fear is the beginning. Stop. Like a caged beast prowling in the dark wounded and pacing. Big, angry, afraid. On the inside. On the inside. It is all on the inside. None of the answers and all of the questions. On the inside. On the blood soaked floor the brave ones slip and fall. You will suffer He says. As I have suffered, He says. And so I wait.
I do not wait in vain. His word is true. Time heals nothing. Only God heals anything. Only God heals anything on the inside.

Sufficient

The Lord, who indwells His children, is watching over them at every moment. Praise be the name of the Father, who, having created us, made known to us His love through His word by the death and resurection of His son. We who are in Him, should take strength and be encouraged- for God is sufficient.